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How parents can become good friends with their children
Posted Date: 12-May-2011
Sangeeta Sanjay Chaubal
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It is been said that how hard parents try they can’t be good friends to their children. But few of the parents have actually proved this statement wrong by actually being real good friends to their children. What is it that a parent needs to do in order to be a good friend to his child? This article helps parents to understand all about what it is like being good friends with their children.
How parents can become good friends with their children
Parenting is no doubt difficult at times but still many of them enjoy it like anything. Its more about not considering parenting as a task or responsibility but as a joyful journey with your kid being there with you. Unlike most of the parents few actually make parenting much much better by not just being parents for their kids but real good friends. Though this has always been a debatable argument whether or not a parent can be good friends with his or her child; but still many of the parents have actually achieved that status of being good friends. As long as you know your limits and duties of being a friend you can definitely be your child's good friend. Though things may not be same once you overdo it or cross your limits. May be that is the reason why only few of the parent are able to achieve the status of a successful parent as well as good friend to a child. It is more about being there for your kid other than just showing off your powers and authority. Parenting is lot more than that and many few learn to understand this fact. Most of the parents try to be friends to their children initially but fail because they either unknowingly overdo it or just mix up with parental authority.
Hence it is really important for a parent to let know his child what he or she really wants to be for them. Either you be a parents who wishes to be good friends with their children or just be parents who wish to show off their authority by mixing power with parenting like most of the parents do. Successful parenting is a complete different ideology and very few parents learn more about it. For many parents parenting is just another chore that they need to do as a duty towards their family. Parents with this ideology can never be good friends to their children how hard they try. But for parents who want to enjoy parenting successfully by involving in each and every decisions and playing an important role in their child's life as active and responsible adults, being a friend to their children would be much easier.
What is it like being good friends to your children
Being good friends to your children is just like playing a role of active friend in your child's life other than just being a authoritative parent. When you as parents are good friends to your kids too trust you more and may come to you for help or just share their feelings with you.
Can all parents be good friends to their children
The answer is no. Not all parents can be good friends to their kids. For being a good friend to your child first parents needs to forget about the authority and power they have on their kid and start thinking the way a child does. This definitely does not mean being like a child but start thinking like them. For instance, if your child commits a mistake other than shouting on him like an adult try and think why he must do something like that. If a child fails in some activity or even in his studies instead of criticizing him a parent who wants to be good friend to his or her child may try to find out what went wrong. Only those parents who handle these things positively and comfortably can be good friends to their children.
Try and think like friends
Whenever you converse with you child or if you child comes to you to share his feeling be a friend. This just means that at that particular moment a parent should actually behave as a friend. When a child shares his feeling with you considering you as a friend then you no way can act like a parent. If your child achieves good score appreciate and if he fails be there to let him know what went wrong other than criticizing him about his failures.
Don't just boast but do be a real good friend
Some parents have a habit of boasting in front of others that they are the best friends of their children. But such parents hardly ever care whether or not their children too feel the same way about them. For such parents its more about pretending then being the real good friend for their children. Such parents force kids to make things their way by using their authority and hardly care about how hurt their child is. So it is better to stop that immediately if you really feel it deep down your heart that you want to be a real good friend of your child.
Always know your limitations
When a parent is good friends to his child he or she may sometimes just cross limits of being a friend. This will hamper the beautiful relationship a parent and a child shares. Hence a parent needs to know his limitations.
Be there whenever your child needs you
When we are in trouble or when we feel sad we always wish to share our feelings with our best friend. So of a parent is playing that part in his or her child's life then they need to be there whenever their child needs them. Or else what is the use of being a good friend.
Allow your child to want to take his decisions
When you wish to develop a friendly relationship with your child you need to give your child his freedom of decision making. As a friend you can actively take part in the decision making and offer him guidance but ultimately the child has to take his decisions.
Enjoy healthy conversations and discussions
Being a friend is not really easy, so what if that is about being a friend to your child. When you claim to be a friend act so. Always enjoy healthy discussions. Allow the child too to express his thoughts and ideas and never just keep talking yourself. Help your child to feel comfortable to discuss any issues with you without any embarrassment or fear. Let him know things from you other than from a wrong source.
Try to spend more time with your children
So what if you are a working parent. Try to take out some time for your child and spend it qualitatively. Indulge in activities or games with your children like any good friend would do.
Always remember that however things shape up, but the fact remains unchanged that you always have best interests for your child and whatever may happen even if the whole world goes topsy-turvy still you are always there for your child and you can always be his or her best friend no matter what.
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