How to stop bullying in school and help your child to adjust

Are you worried about bullying in your child's school? Want to know how to deal with bullying and help your child?

Does your child make excuses for not attending school? Is your child scared about attending particular class for some unknown reasons? If your answer for any of the above questions is yes, then may be your child is being bullied by one or more student in his class or school. Most of the kids have to face bullies daily mostly during their school life. This article helps parents understand the concept of bullying and how they can help their children to deal with bullying in school.

How to help your child deal with bullying at school


Does your child make excuses for not attending school? Is your child scared about attending particular class for some unknown reasons? Does your child ever keep complaining about not wanting to go to school as he is afraid of some boy in his class? Does your child keep demanding more and more money to buy out lunches but at the end of the day looks hungry and exhausted? If your answer for any of the above questions is yes, then may be your child is being bullied by one or more student in his class or school and that is the real reason behind all these excuses. If your child is being bullied by someone in school, remember it's a very serious matter. Bullying may leave your child devastated. He or she may get scared of going to school or visiting particular classes where the bullying is carried on. You may also find your child making certain excuses for not attending the same. Very often, parents ignore bullying and leave their kids alone to fend for themselves. But this is exactly where parents go wrong. This is a situation which few kids are not able to handle all alone and hence they need their parents to stand beside them. If parents help their child to deal with bullying in school or anywhere else, kids may find it pretty easy to handle the situation.

Research shows that out of every 10 kids, at least 1 or 2 students have to deal with bullying. Out of these, few very well handle the situations; same can't be said about each and everyone out there. Many children feel very hopeless and even helpless in such situations and wonder what to do. In fact few of them even get scared of the slightest sight of the school bully and try to run away from him. If such situations are left alone on kids, they may get lonely and may not be able to handle the situations very well. What would happen next is your child may grow timid and would always try to run away from such situations, which may work against his self esteem.

What is bullying


To learn about how to help your child to deal with bullying, lets try to understand the concept of bullying. What exactly bullying is, in simple words, an act where a child is teased or abused by another child who may be more or less of the same age group, but little stronger to him or little older to him. Bullying if done in a playful manner, can be ignored. But when it is done in a way to purposely hurt someone, to scare someone or to be unkind to someone then it is definitely a matter of concern. If a child is being bullied, he is meant to face anything from the following:

- The child is subjected to physical abuse in front of others.

- The child is being teased or called by different names in front of the class.

- The child is been threatened to dire consequences for not performing certain actions.

- The child is been asked for money every now and then forcibly.

- Rumors are spread about the child and he is been made a center of jokes in front of everyone.

Different types of bullying faced by kids in school

A child may face various forms of bullying which may include:

- Physical abuse, where a child is subjected to hitting, mocking, kicking. This may also include harm to child's property, for example, tearing pages of his books, breaking his bicycle, tearing his clothes etc.

- Verbal abuse, where a child may be constantly teased or taunted in front of everyone in class or canteen. The teasing may relate to any name given to the child or even relate to any gossip which may just be rumored.

- Cyber bullying, where a child is subjected to threatening mails or funny text messages every now and then; thus making him a center of fun and entertainment for others.

What can bullying do to your child

When a child is being bullied constantly in school, he or she is affected in many ways. The child is afraid to go to school or visit the particular class when he faces the kids who bully him. If bullied constantly a child may:

- Start making excuses for not visiting school.

- Get depressed

- Face anxiety

- Have lower self esteem

- Have low confidence levels

- Grow up as timid

- Have serious health or psychological problems.

- Even try suicidal attempts.

These consequences definitely look serious and its time parent takes up bullying seriously. Let's learn few ways which may help parents to help their child deal bullying in school.

Look out for warning signals

Parents would never know about what is going on in school unless their child comes and tells them about it. Of course if a child is bruised or injured, a parent may ask their child about what happened. But if a child is been threatened to not tell his parents about what is happening in school, he may not open up. Hence parents need to look out for warning signals which may help them recognize whether or not there is something wrong with their child. These warning signals include the following:

- Your child makes constant excuses for not attending particular classes.

- These excuses may include severe stomachaches or dizziness, related to only that class time and disappear as soon as the class is missed.

- Your child always looks wary or anxious.

- Your child gets nightmares and has various other sleeping problems.

- Your child starts avoiding his school bus or even tries changing his usual road due to fear of the bully.

- If your child keeps demanding for money for extra - lunches, but still looks hungry whenever back from school.

Help your child open up

If your child is scared and fearing to open up, help him out with it. He may be afraid of how the parents may react on such situation. Few parents start with serious shouting on kids about getting afraid of some other kid in school. But instead of doing so, help your child to express himself and learn about his fears. Try to understand how and why your child is facing problem. Ask your child about each and every detail which will help you to understand better. Comfort your child with trust and caring so that he feels secure. Help your child to recognize and understand about his own strengths and speak to him about his positive side enough to boost up his confidence. Help your child by teaching him different ways by which he may be able to handle the bully by himself.

Discuss the matter with the school authority

When your child opens up to you about his fears and problems of bullying in school, don't just keep it with yourself, but go do something about it. Speak to the school's authority including the class teacher, and even the school principal. Also contact the bully's parents and inform them about what is going on in the school. Meet them personally and speak to them clearly about how your child is suffering in this situation.

Read more on how to handle bullies at school.

Top 10 tips for parents to help their child deal with bullying at school

1. Always keep a regular follow-up about your child's daily activities.

2. Speak with your child about things that he did in school and listen carefully to everything that he says.

3. If your child has been affected badly with the bullying episodes, help him by diverting his attention on other things, like new activities or new hobby class.

4. Encourage your child to fight the situation himself, other than getting personally involved. This way you may be able to boost his confidence.

5. If the school fails to help your child with bullying even after constant complaints take the issue to the school board. Finally it is the school's responsibility to provide each and every child a safer environment to study.

6. Never blame your child about being coward and not been able to handle the situation.

7. Teach your child various ways about walking out of a situation without causing much harm to them. Let your child understand about various strategies which may help him handle the bully in a correct manner.
For example: If your child is been bullied by his classmate, ask him to ignore and walk away from the classmate, ignoring his comment and not at all reacting on them. Teach him how he can just get things right by learning to ignore things.

8. Help your child to learn anger management, which may come out as a handy tactic.

9. Help your child understand why he is been targeted by the bully. Let him know the motives of a bully; by explain how bullies always target the weak kids. Help him develop and boost his own self esteem in order to not be afraid of any bully anymore.

10. Let your child know that he is not alone in this situation and that you are going to help him fight with it with equal support.

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