Should kids sleep with parents
Most parents are often having few questions on their mind, and many parents are often seen seeking advice on these questions which being the following:
- Should kids sleep with parents?
- Is co-sleeping in the best interest of the child?
- How long should a kid sleep with their parents?
- Are parents being excessively attentive by co-sleeping with their children?
- Are parents being too much demanding by making children sleep with their parents?
- Should kids be allowed to sleep in other bedroom?
- Is it safe enough to be allowed kids to have their own bedroom, right from their childhood?
Such questions often arise in parent's mind. Every individual has his own perspective while answering this question. The answer also depends on from where the parent and child belong to. In country like India, Co-sleeping prevails and kids may sleep with their parents as long as they are 9 to 10 years old mostly in many families. However in countries like US, kids sleep in separate beds as soon as they are born. They have their own cribs when they are infants and then separate bedrooms. So it totally depends on each and every family's perspective and overall ideology on where their kids should actually sleep.
Concept of co-sleeping
Co-sleeping is a term that is been given to the practice which is normally found in many households, where in children are allowed to sleep within close proximity to parents; or in simpler words parents and children share the same bed.
Co-sleeping is a common practice
Co-sleeping definitely is a common practice and many in many ways has been suggested to be a healthy practice. Not only India, but many countries like Africa, overall Asia, Eastern Europe, or even in many parts of South America include households that allow co-sleeping though up to a limited period. However India ranks number one when it comes to bed-sharing of children with parents.
Why co-sleeping is often practiced
One of the major reasons to practice co-sleeping is the culture in most countries, for say in India, co-sleeping is found in maximum due to the culture and also due to the advantages attached to it. When it come to infant's co-sleeping is practiced by mothers as it allows total proximity to them in nights to be besides their child, so as to know whether the baby is awake or hungry. Also in many countries, co-sleeping also may be practiced due to many other reasons, such as:
- Lack of space.
- Feel of comfort of having your child beside you.
- Feel of safety for children.
- Being able to be their whenever the child needs you.
- Feel of comfort for the child who does not wish to sleep in separate bedrooms.
- Many health professionals and medical experts prescribe this to be a safe and healthy practice.
Hence these and many such other reasons make co-sleeping a common practice. Once the child is allowed to sleep with their parents or made to share the same bedroom; then the child gets used to it and thus they refuse to sleep in separate rooms away from their parents.
Till what age co-sleeping should be practiced
Co-sleeping is considered to be a healthy practice by many health professionals and hence parents are often seen sharing bedrooms with their children in many households. But the real question is even if the practice of co-sleeping safe and healthy, how long should it be practised? Is there any particular time limit or age limitation to this practice? The answer for this is yes, there is and should definitely be an age limitation for co-sleeping. Research has shown that co-sleeping should be practised only till a child is 5 to 6 years old. Till this age, a child should be allowed to sleep with his parents, as it makes them feel safer and also comfort them. But after that the child should be made to sleep in independent bedrooms, so as to make them independent. By doing so parents not just make the child independent but also tend to set out healthy boundaries for the family in all.
How should parents convince a child to sleep in their independent bedrooms
Once a child starts sleeping with his parents sharing their bedrooms, it may get difficult for the child to sleep alone in the beginning. It is parent's job to convince the child to sleep in separate bedrooms. But how are they going to do that? It may sound tough in the beginning but may be not so difficult once a parent decides that he or she has to break the practice of co-sleeping. Here's how parents can convince their child to do so:
- If it is difficult for a child to sleep in separate bedrooms, then parents need to discuss the issues with their children. Do see to it that this discussion is done during day time and not when the child is about to sleep or during night times.
- If your child has a habit of taking afternoon naps, then start from allowing him to take these naps alone in his or her bedroom. Make it a common practice for few days and thus convince him to try out the same thing in the night.
- If your child is afraid of sleeping alone in his bedroom than make him feel comfortable by making him known that you are always there when he needs you. If the child has issues with darkness, then put up a small lamp in his room that makes him feel comfortable.
- Try to get your child excited by the idea of sleeping independently in his or her own bedroom. Do so by making him or her feel how they are grown up and need their own space.
- To begin with, a parent can always be in the child's bedroom until the child goes to sleep. What a parent can do is have a healthy discussion about what happened in school or just read out a story book and wait till the child sleeps. Once the child sleeps the parent can leave the bedroom.
- Speak to the child and allow him to open up if he has any issues regarding sleeping away from you. Clear his doubts if he has one regarding why he is been told to do so. In many cases child may also feel that he is being punished and such doubts should be cleared.
- Try to establish certain rules about sleeping independently and do follow them.
- In case your child gets bad dreams or nightmares and is really scared then allow him to sleep with you for that night. Don't just be strict about this rule.
- In case your child throws tantrum about not sleeping in separate bedrooms then see that you don't allow your child to get over you. Stick to the rules and follow them.
- Reward your child if he learns to sleep independently and starts feeling comfortable about it.
Your child may find it difficult to sleep alone in his room for the time-being, but regular practice may make it easy for them. Once they get used to it than they too will enjoy their independence.
Hope you got answer for should kids sleep with parents or not.
I'm sleeping with my mom and I love it.
Unlike in foreign countries there are not separate bed rooms for the children in India and up to the age of 5 and even more the children are made to sleep along with the parents. Children have the fear complex during the night and hence they need the parents support to ward of any evil dreams on them. Moreover the parents know the behaving patterns of the child on the bed and they would create a feel good facility for the child to sleep unhindered and therefore sound sleep for the children is ensured. And some children wants to listen to the bed time stories which need to be attended by parents when the children are sleeping besides them. And if you ask any child , they would surely tell that they feel the warmth and secure when they sleep with the parents otherwise scary dreams would bother them often.